House of Torment

No matter how chilling a haunted house may be, visitors can always find solace in one simple rule--the goblins and demons that roam the hallways are simply not permitted to touch you.

Yet, in the absence of traditional physical contact, the performers still find ways to make your skin crawl.

A popular method of torment seemed to be flowing from the mouths of numerous male creatures. While their cadaverous extremities politely halted inches from my body, their mouths broke rank and blew a gentle twist of lukewarm air. The act served as an unwelcome greeting.

As foreign diaphragms extracted breeze onto the back of my neck, it was clear the space barrier had been thoroughly penetrated.

They were no longer horrendous zombies or stalking masked nightmares, but just some creepy twentysomething dudes blowing on the back of each passing neck.